Saturday 14 December 2019

The Brexiteers are Victorious!

At exactly 10.00 pm on Thursday, the BBC ran its exit poll which gave Boris a massive majority and I whooped with delight at the thought that the torture of the past three years would soon be over. A few hours later the sun rose over a country that had just reaffirmed the 2016 vote for independence and by that time enough real votes from real people had been counted to prove the accuracy of the exit poll. We were victorious and at that point, I dragged myself off to bed.

There was no need for any of the political lunacy and social upheaval that we have gone through since 2016. All the opposition had to do was vote for Theresa May's nice, liberal withdrawal agreement and by now the European Union would have been nothing but a memory.

Instead, they decided to play silly buggers by taking advantage of a government with no majority to delay our Brexit. When they weren't using dubious procedures in the Commons, they were using their wealth to seek the assistance of compliant judges to further delay the process. Their aim was to so weary us that we would give up on the whole idea of Brexit, probably stop voting altogether and leave the country to be permanently governed by them, with the approval of their supporters.

We bided our time and waited our sweat until eventually, we got what we wanted, a general election. Then we showed those pathetic federast fuckers what free men armed with the most powerful weapon in the world, a ballot paper, can do.

It's time to put this blog on ice and enjoy some peace and quiet after forty long years of campaigning for this moment:

We are the victors and they are the vanquished: what a glorious time it is to be alive!

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